“Sorry is not good enough. Something has to be different.”

A thought by Henry Cloud, from his book, Never Go Back: 10 Things You’ll Never Do Again (p. 16). Howard Books. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

We many times believe that being sorry is the key to going back to a broken relationship or a job.

But Henry says, “Something has to be different. There must be fruit, results, or a real change in life or the situation that gives reason to believe that something will be different this time. So here is the main concept: If you ‘go back,’ make sure you are going forward.

“That way you are not going back just to repeat what has already been. You are truly moving forward because something tangible is different. Someone being ‘sorry’ (ourselves included) is not enough; just missing the good parts of what was is not reason enough to return; going back to assuage the pain—temporarily, mind you—is not enough. Life is meant to be forward moving, not backward. Make sure that if you ‘go back,’ you’re not going back to the same thing.”

He continues, “In business, we often see this when someone ends a relationship with a boss, a company, an employee, a strategy, a partnership, or even an industry. They move on for a while, only to go back and do it all over again. They rehire the person or go back to work for the same boss or company that they left for good reason or some other redo. For some reason, they think it will be different this time. Yet they find themselves back where they were to start with.”

He then says, “Remember: There is a reason it did not work. If you are going back, make very, very sure that reason is no longer there. You need to see more than just a ‘sorry’ or a commitment to make it work ‘this time.’ You need to see a real, verifiable change. People do change, and people do learn. Situations change; dynamics that were once present and making something not work can be different now. People build skills, learn new things, develop new capacities, etc. That is what life is about, and all of our lives hopefully are in a direction of getting better, not worse. Just make sure that is the case before you ‘go back’ to anything.”

That really makes sense, doesn’t it?

Yes, yes!

Comments

“There’s a big difference between building a castle and building a kingdom.”

A thought by Bob Goff from his book, Everybody, Always: Becoming Love in a World Full of Setbacks and Difficult People ( p. 41). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Have you ever built a sand castle or maybe a Lego castle? Have you? Bob says, “We actually build castles all the time, out of our jobs and our families and the things we’ve purchased. Sometimes we even make them out of each other. Some of these castles are impressive too. Lots of people come to admire what we’ve built over the course of our lives and tell us what great castles we have. But Jesus told His friends we weren’t supposed to spend our lives building castles. He said He wanted us to build a kingdom, and there’s a big difference between building a castle and building a kingdom.” Bob goes on, “You see, castles have moats to keep creepy people out, but kingdoms have bridges to let everyone in. Castles have dungeons for people who ha...

“When you understand that life is a test, you realize that nothing is insignificant in your life.”

A thought by Rick Warren, (2012-10-23) from his book, The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here For? (Purpose Driven Life, The) (p. 57). Zondervan. Kindle Edition. To realize that from God’s perspective life is a test goes a long way in determining how you handle your life. It is important to see that in testing your character is both developed and revealed. Rick goes on to say that “even the smallest incident has significance for your character development. Every day is an important day, and every second is a growth opportunity to deepen your character, to demonstrate love, or to depend on God.” So there is a God purpose behind each situation in your life. Even the bad ones are there to strengthen you and develop you. You see those bad situations are really good ones because they are there for your good. I start each day with a reminder that God is good. Not every situation that is going to come in my day is good but because G...

“What areas of my personality, background, and physical appearance am I struggling to accept?”

A thought by Rick Warren, (2012-10-23) from his book, The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here For? (Purpose Driven Life, The) (p. 35). Zondervan. Kindle Edition. Rick posed this question at the end of his chapter, You Are Not an Accident. In this chapter he deals with the fact that God created you the way you are with a purpose. In other words you are not an accident. I am also reading the Apostle John’s view of Jesus and what He said and did while He was here on earth. In the beginning of Chapter 9 there is a story about a blind man. And the disciples who were with Him asked Him a good question, “Who sinned, this man or his parents that he was born blind? ” Have you ever asked the same thing about something in you that you don’t like? Like that characteristic is a curse or something. Society has set a standard that is not a standard of God. Remember, He created you and you are not an accident. Je...

Just Continue That Thought...

Search This Blog