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“I had set myself up to fail again.”

A thought by Lisa Bevere, from her book, Be Angry, But Don’t Blow It (p.24) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) This is so important to see. Lisa said, “… if I was disappointed with the way I had handled my children during the day, I pressed the issue very heavily: I should be more patient. Then I would allow guilt to weigh on me until I felt hopelessly horrible, and in this despair and self-loathing I would go to sleep. My hope was to wake up feeling so bad about my impatience that it would not be replayed. Instead, I would wake up feeling hopeless and like a failure. This would weigh me down and make me feel overwhelmed, which made the challenges of the day seem that much more taxing. I had set myself up to fail again. I have learned both self-loathing and anger are destructive. Inflicting guilt does not reform our relationships with others, nor will it work on you.” She goes on, “Jesus understood that the

“Studies have proven that most of us develop our anger response as small children.”

A thought by Lisa Bevere, from her book, Be Angry, But Don’t Blow It (p.22) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Lisa says, “Patterns are established through positive or negative reinforcement. We learned what worked or got us attention, and we repeated it so often it became a habit.” And habits can control us, can’t they? She continues, “Some of you may have made the dangerous decision to go to bed angry in ignorance as I did as a child. Others of you may have known the truth yet chose your own wisdom. Still others of you don’t go to your bed angry at another individual. No, your anger is leveled at yourself. You go to sleep disappointed and upset with yourself and imagine by punishing yourself throughout the night you will awake changed and different. But this is not true. The nightly punishment will not be constructive but destructive. “You are mistaken to think anger is only destructive when vented on

“An integral part of being angry and not sinning is knowing when to let go of your anger.”

A thought by Lisa Bevere, from her book, Be Angry, But Don’t Blow It (p.17) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) And we must let go, don’t we? Lisa says, “Perpetuating anger perpetuates sin, which perpetuates unforgiveness, which intensifies the anger response. You no longer are dealing with each infraction of displeasure; you are dealing with an accumulation of many infractions against your person. You are repeatedly scraped by the same offense until it is no longer the site of a single injury but a multiple stab wound.” She goes on, “Let’s probe deeper into the part of Ephesians 4:26 that says, ‘Do not let the sun go down on your anger.’ There is a very important spiritual and physical principle here. When you go to sleep upset, you wake up upset. When you have not extended mercy the night before, it is hard for you to embrace God’s mercy in the morning (Ps. 59:16). “In Psalm 4:4, David warned of the dan

“The old-fashioned rule of counting to ten is good, but often the time frame is not adequate.”

A thought by Lisa Bevere, from her book, Be Angry, But Don’t Blow It (p.13) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) It may not be enough time. Lisa says, “It’s worth noting again: Our first response when angered should be to turn away momentarily, mentally or physically, so we can separate the offense from the offender. The old-fashioned rule of counting to ten is good, but often the time frame is not adequate. Once we have stepped aside from the conflict, then we need to ask, ‘Why am I so upset?’ ‘What is really going on inside me?’ ‘Do I need to take some time to answer these questions?’” Ephesians 4:6 (NIV) says, “Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.” She goes on, “The idea of anger being temporary also corresponds to God’s admonition ‘Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.’ This is not because of some problem with the dark. All of us have found ourselves upset after the sun

“God models the healthy type of anger for us…”

A thought by Lisa Bevere, from her book, Be Angry, But Don’t Blow It (p.12) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) He is to be our example. Lisa says, “Too frequently we live in a constant state of flare-up punctuated by brief interludes of happiness. God models the healthy type of anger for us: ‘For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime’ (Ps. 30:5 NIV). “The ratio of anger to favor is very low. David described God’s anger as lasting but a moment. David should know; he experienced the anger of the Lord firsthand. He lost his son when the anger of the Lord was kindled against his secret sins of adultery and murder. David could have become embittered against God and viewed His anger as lasting a lifetime and His favor as momentary. Did not the sword continually visit his house? Yet David had caught a glimpse of God’s character and nature. Through repentance, he clung to God’s loving-kindness

“Most of us can accomplish this without even trying.”

A thought by Lisa Bevere, from her book,     Be Angry, But Don’t Blow It    (p.9) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Now, what is she talking about? Lisa says, “The first part of Ephesians 4:26 is easy enough: Be angry . Most of us can accomplish this without even trying. It happens without warning. Someone cuts us off on the highway and careless words are hurled into the air, never to be retrieved. . . This verse seems at first a contradiction. It clearly grants us the right to feel anger. Be angry . There is not even a preceding disclaimer, like ‘If you absolutely have to get angry, then okay . . . be angry.’ Just a simple Be angry . The NIV translation reads, ‘In your anger do not sin.’ It seems to further validate the experience of anger, assuring us there will be times of anger, but telling us not to sin during them.” She goes on, “God gives us permission to be angry. He knows and understands man’s inborn