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"Often it is difficult for us to admit that our hurt occurred."

  A thought by H. Norman Wright from his book,  When the Past Won't Let You Go   (p. 10). Harvest House Publishers. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) This can be so true. Norman says, "I’ve heard a number of reasons why some don’t want to face their old wounds.  • Some don’t want to admit that what happened to them actually happened.  • Some believe if they admit to the hurt and pain of the past, they are in some way different or damaged and not useful to others. They want to see themselves as okay, but they don’t. They definitely don’t want others to know to avoid being judged or offered unwanted advice.  • Some are afraid to confront the painful past. That’s understandable. There is fear that experiencing the pain again might be too much to bear.  • There is also the fear that confronting the past may require change, which opens the door to failure." He goes on, "The reality is that to move from being a yesterday person to

"You and I are products of the past as is everyone."

A thought by H. Norman Wright from his book, When the Past Won't Let You Go   (p. 8). Harvest House Publishers. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Yes we are, but... Norman says, " But many live in the expectation of the future. For many, these two times are permanent. Do you ever wonder why we waste so much time not living in the present? 'Many are distracted by the there and then rather than the here and now .' ( 1 )" He goes on, "Consider the thoughts of a man whose past could have destroyed him: We bear the imprint of the past as it is, not as it might have been. What actually happened is irreversible, and so are the consequences. In that sense we are powerless. We can spend the rest of our days reviewing and wishing and imagining and scheming, but we will never be able to alter what has already happened. The past is simply there, influencing everything we do. The best we can do—in fact, the only thing we can do—i

"Here’s the reality: You ARE seen, you are NOT invisible."

A thought by Gary Chapman from his book,  Seen. Known. Loved.  (p. 21). Moody Publishers. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) That's good news! Gary says, " God wants you to know that He sees you at your best and your worst and He chooses to love you regardless. So often, feeling loved is about being seen. For words of affirmation people, we try desperately to make ourselves seen so that we can get the reward of being told we are seen and liked. We dread feeling invisible and work hard to receive the words of affirmation that help us feel confident that we are seen and loved. This is what is so incredible, for better and worse, about social media. We can make ourselves seen in a way that was never possible before. We make ourselves seen . . . by posting pictures of our lives, snapshots that tell the world we are here. However, have you ever posted something only to have almost nobody 'like' your post? What’s even worse, perhaps,

"Some people really, really need to hear the actual words."

  A thought by Gary Chapman from his book, Seen. Known. Loved.  (p. 18). Moody Publishers. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) That is so true! Gary says, " For people whose primary love language is words of affirmation, unsolicited compliments or expressions of encouragement mean everything! Hearing the actual words 'I love you' makes their day. Hearing the reasons behind that love sends our spirits skyward." He goes on, "The problem: Words of affirmation are powerful, but for many of us, we just can’t get enough. Comments and likes in our social media feeds make us crave for more and more words of affirmation. The more we get, the more we want. Reagan, for example, is a words of affirmation woman. By her early thirties, Reagan had become a stay-at-home mother of two beautiful children. While she was living a life of love with her family, she began to compare herself to her peers. She often wondered if she was a good mom,

"... but we make progress by some daily denials of our freedom."

  A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book,  Jesus Over Everything  (p. 79). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Now this may not be for everyone, but it should be! Lisa says, " It’s not unlike the 'I can eat this because it’s available to me, but should I?' principle. Most of us wouldn’t consider eating doughnuts for every meal. We could; we are free to. It is not illegal. We may have the money, and no one is telling us no. But is it good for our bodies? Is it best for us in all ways—will our brains function well, and will we have the most energy? Of course the answer is no, and we are mature enough to be able to tell ourselves no, to do what’s best for the bodies we care enough about to withhold something from them. (We also operate with common sense, which more of us could greatly benefit from in other areas of life instead of trying to justify them with our intellectual arguments.)" She goes on, "Denial of

"When someone is unlovable and we love that person anyway, we are shadowing God."

A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book,  Jesus Over Everything  (p. 56-57). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) He makes the difference. Lisa says, " Love is stronger than fear, betrayal, anger, resentment, doubt, disappointment, and, yes, judgment because we chose God and God is love—the ultimate love. It’s ours if we want it, choose it, and pray to live it, every day. When someone is unlovable and we love that person anyway, we are shadowing God. This is what being a Jesus follower means. We may think loving someone is about them. But, ultimately, it’s about Him. Our behavior flows from there." She then says, "But it’s not just that real love is strong, though that would be enough. It is that it is strong er. It is the 1 John 4:4 principle: 'You, dear children, are from God and have overcome . . . because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world' (NIV). Love has overcome many ba

"We judge because we recognize in others what we don’t like in ourselves."

A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book,  Jesus Over Everything  (p. 52). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) And that is so true. Lisa says, " So often you can find us being the hardest on someone we see reflected in ourselves. We feel put off by the things we recognize as places we need to work on, sins we struggle with, characteristics we deeply wish away. It’s easier for us to judge people than to deal with the fact that we are disappointed in ourselves or to work on getting better. The way we judge others for the things we recognize in us is a sign that we are struggling to love ourselves, first, which makes it impossible for us to love another." She goes on, "A life of judgment never fulfills and results in feelings of loneliness and resentment. It may be easier to choose judgment, but it’s healthier to choose love. C. S. Lewis said this: "To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart w

". . . real is the best pretty because it doesn’t ask you to lie."

  A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book,  Jesus Over Everything  (p. 38). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) That is a tremendous thought. Lisa says, " I didn’t know how to be me because I misunderstood the process of becoming . Too often the unfinished us is blind to what the Spirit-shaped us can be over time. Lies have felt true, damning, and permanent. We aren’t weak for falling for them. We are human. But we need to put the truth of Jesus over them now." She goes on, "I don’t want you to go on believing any untrue things, like I have, so let me say it to you: real is the best pretty because it doesn’t ask you to lie . Besides the fact that Jesus created us to be the real us, things get complicated when we try to live our life making it all look pretty; it’s exhausting and discouraging to the rest of us who need someone . . . to be real—about how hard the cancer is—about how adoptions aren’t all roses even thou

"The world is full of thinkers and feelers, and both are a gift from God."

A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book,  Jesus Over Everything  (p. 20). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) This is what she calls the problem of over analyzing. Lisa says, "Some of us come into this world with amazing natural radar. Add the Holy Spirit to that and you have a true gift to this world. Highly emotive people keep the rest of us accountable to the needs and hurts of folks—the world cannot exist without them. But thinking too much can also lead down dark roads. It can cause us to imagine things that aren’t true, to make up entire narratives that hurt us unnecessarily. Relying on our feelings is dangerous as well. Feelings serve as a gauge but not a boss. As a creative, overanalyzing can cause me such pain because nothing is ever good enough—perfection creeps in, doubt takes over, and before I know it, I have become paralyzed by the thoughts in my head that don’t have merit. This deadly 'over' has taken up

"A lot of us are chronic overexplainers."

  A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book,  Jesus Over Everything  (p. 19). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Would you explain that? Lisa says, "We feel our first stab at words wasn’t good. What we are saying doesn’t feel adequate. We may be trying to couch a hard truth that needs to be said, so we say it . . . and then say it again, and again, and maybe again, if we feel it necessary. My friend Tracy tells me she is learning that 'it’s okay to say no without giving all the reasons.' That 'no is a complete sentence.' A big and hard-fought amen to that. Not everyone needs to know why you can’t come to that dinner party—maybe your daughter has revealed to you something difficult, and you are not in a good place to go and pretend when your heart is in pain. It’s okay not to go, and it’s okay to say you aren’t coming, but thank you, and leave it at that. And on that note, may we all be better accepters without d

"Don’t assume that because your life isn’t working, you need a whole different life."

  A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book,  Jesus Over Everything  (p. 9). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) But we do need something, don't we? Lisa says, "Sometimes you need God to finally run yours. Too often we throw perfectly good lives in the trash in search of ones we end up tarnishing all over. The core of why our lives don’t work isn’t the life itself but what we internally never made right. This is why we wind up repeating patterns." She goes on, "I’ve watched humans awhile, and I have a theory. Despite our temporary feelings, there are three things that make our lives not work in the long term: 1.​too many options 2.​getting away with something that is not good for us 3.​trying to handle everything ourselves. "Too many options lead to mental confusion, second-guessing, and dissatisfaction with our lives. We spend our lives in angst over the great what ifs—what if we had picked that life or that

"Most of the change God has done in me has come from me doing things the hard way, that is, my way."

  A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book, Jesus Over Everything (p. 6). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Change is such an important thing but also a very difficult thing for us to do. But we need to do it in order for Jesus to be over everything. Lisa says, "This is the upheaving of self, long buried in the denial tactics we humans are so good at mastering. Moments when I found myself in such a mess, with Jesus holding me as He cleaned my wounds, reminding me of His wellness plan. . . I haven’t forgotten that history. When you’ve been maimed from self-inflicted wounds, you don’t soon forget." She goes on, "The truth is, I can’t choose my way over Jesus’ way anymore because I can’t afford the scars. A Jesus-over-everything lifestyle is a Jesus-take-over-me-and-my-lifestyle so I don’t ruin my one precious life. But even more than that, it’s the understanding that the priority of Jesus brings order to the chaos o

"Strong emotional appeal should trigger a red flag, not a green light."

   A thought by Andy Stanley from his book,   Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets   (p. 64). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Okay, what does he mean? Andy says, "When confronted with anything or anybody that has strong emotional appeal, press pause, not play. Strong emotional appeal should trigger a red flag, not a green light. When something is emotionally appealing, instead of leaning in, we should step back. Not because he’s not the one. He may be. Not because it’s not a good investment. It may be. Not because it’s not the perfect job. It may be. We should step back because anything with strong emotional appeal . . . even the right thing . . . clouds our judgment. So pause. Get your bearings. Go home and think about it. Call a friend. Consider your story." He goes on, "Considering your story positions and empowers you to counteract the effects of focalism  . . ." Earlier he said, "Focalism, or anchoring as i

"You rarely have to sell yourself on a good idea."

A thought by Andy Stanley from his book,   Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets   (p. 32). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) You realize that, don't you? Andy says, "You rarely have to sell yourself on the right thing to do, the healthy thing to do, the responsible thing to do. You just know. Good ideas rarely need any defense. When you start selling yourself, you need to hit the pause button and ask, 'Am I being completely honest with myself . . . really? If so, why am I selling myself so hard?' The wise thing to do is usually so compelling it doesn’t need selling." He goes on, "Our hearts get wrapped around something or someone and we experience desire. Want. So the heart sends a message to the brain: 'Hey brain, I want this. Figure out a way to justify it and get it for me.' Now our brains are smart. That’s why we call them brains. And our brains know that whereas it’s difficult to justify a want , it

"Just tell yourself the truth."

A thought by Andy Stanley from his book,   Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets   (p. 25). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Andy in this book is dealing with five questions for us to ask in making decisions and his first one is "Am I being honest with myself?" He says, "You may not owe it to anyone else. But you owe it to yourself to be honest about why you choose what you choose, why you’re deciding what you’re deciding. There’s no win in selling yourself. There’s no win in justifying options.  "Just tell yourself the truth." He goes on, "It helps to ask this question twice. But on the second round, it helps to add a word.  • Am I being honest with myself . . . really?  • Why am I doing this . . . really?  • Why am I avoiding him . . . really?  • Why am I postponing this . . . really?  • Why do I keep making excuses . . . really?  • Why am I going . . . really?  • Why did I say yes . . . really?  • Why did

"Ever tried to lead a liar?"

  A thought by Andy Stanley from his book,   Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets   (p. 21). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) It can be tough, can't it? Especially when it is you and me. Andy says, "It’s pretty much impossible to lead a liar. In professional settings, you fire a liar. . . Fire the dishonest version of you and hire a new you . . . an honest you . . . a you that always tells you the truth, even when it makes you feel bad about you. Besides, dishonesty leaks. Lie to yourself and you’ll lie to others. FYI, if you have a hard time telling other people the truth when the truth makes you look bad . . . you’re probably not being honest with yourself either. It works both ways. "You know from experience that dishonesty erodes credibility and undermines moral authority. In a similar way, when we are dishonest with ourselves, it erodes credibility with ourselves. Sounds strange, I know. But when we lie out loud, what

"The easiest person to deceive is the person in the mirror."

A thought by Andy Stanley from his book,   Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets   (p. 19). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) That probably isn't the way it should be, but it is. Andy says, "You have talked yourself into . . . deceived yourself into . . . every bad decision you have ever made. Worse, you were the mastermind behind most of your regrettable decisions. Financial, relational, professional, academic. You were there for and willingly participated in all of ’em. "You’ve done more to undermine you own success and progress than anyone on the planet. Granted, there were outside pressures. Other voices. People promising you stuff. Maybe even threatening you with stuff. But in the end, you decided. But in most cases, you didn’t decide by carefully weighing all the options and seeking wise counsel. You did the opposite." He goes on, "In many instances, maybe even most, you knew better. Or, you should have known

"They planned a regret."

A thought by Andy Stanley from his book,   Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets   (p. 11). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) So what does he mean by that? Andy says, "When we see other people make what we know to be bad decisions, it’s as if they are strategically and intentionally undermining their own happiness. It takes a lot of planning to marry someone you are incompatible with. It takes time and energy to launch a business built on faulty assumptions and poor market analysis. Think about all the paperwork couples have to wade through to purchase a house they can’t afford or apply for a loan they will struggle to repay. In most cases, these weren’t spur-of-the-moment decisions. It took planning." "Nobody decides to blow up a marriage. But every divorce is on the tail end of a string of decisions, including the decision to get married in the first place. Nobody decides to raise irresponsible, codependent children. But l

"Our decisions determine the direction and quality of our lives."

A thought by Andy Stanley from his book,   Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets   (p. 8). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) And direction and quality are what we want. Andy says, "Our decisions determine the direction and quality of our lives. Your decisions have shaped the direction and quality of your life so far—for good and for . . . well, maybe not so good. You are where you are for the most part because of decisions you’ve made. "So yeah, it’s your fault. I thought we should get that out of the way up front. But it’s not all bad news. "Regret and disappointment aren’t the only things spilling out of your decision pipeline. Your greatest joys and accomplishments are as well. Moral of the story: regardless of how things are going or have gone, you are responsible for you. You get to write the story." He goes on, "If you’re like most people, you would like to go back and unmake a few decisions—the decisions t

"My dad had a terrible habit."

  A thought by Andy Stanley from his book, Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets (p. 1). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) I'm sure every child thinks this to be true. Andy says, "I thought it was terrible, anyway.  "He wouldn’t tell me what to do.  "Specifically, he wouldn’t tell me what to do when I didn’t know what to do and wanted him to tell me what he thought I should do." He goes on, "True, most kids don’t want their parents telling them what to do. And I was like most kids most of the time. But on occasion, I wanted him to tell me what to do. And he wouldn’t. Worse, instead of answering my questions, he asked me questions! His go-to question was: What are you going to do when I’m not around to tell you what to do? "My go-to response was: But you are around, so tell me! "Clearly, his response did not indicate a lack of interest on his part. Just the opposite. As it turns out, I employed th

"... but mediocrity always seems reasonable when you doubt God’s best."

A thought by Shaun Nepstad from his book,  Don't Quit in the Dip  (p. 92). Worthy. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Here is the whole thought, "God has a best, but mediocrity always seems reasonable when you doubt God’s best." And that is true too many times, isn't it? Shaun says, "Tell yourself right now, I’m not going to settle. Do not settle for the thought that God is to be seen from a distance but not experienced. Do not believe the lie that this is all there is in life. God has more available. But He needs you to not settle and to never quit in the dip." He later says, "Sometimes we settle because we get tired, and other times we settle because we get distracted. That’s why it is so important to keep vision in front of us. 'Where there is no vision, the people perish' (Proverbs 29:18 KJV). "You may have heard the phrase 'vision leaks.' That means that we can get inspired, but if we d

"It’s time to lift the lid."

A thought by Shaun Nepstad from his book,  Don't Quit in the Dip  (p. 86). Worthy. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Do you feel you have a lid over your potential, something that is keeping you from fulfilling your dream? Shaun says, "A lid, by definition, is 'a removable or hinged cover' (per Dictionary.com)." He goes on, "READ THAT AGAIN. I want to make sure you catch it, because there’s good news tucked inside that definition. It’s removable! Meaning, as my friend and leadership expert John Maxwell so many times reminds us, 'You can lift the lid!' There is hope that the lid can be removed. I don’t care how long the lid has been over your life, and it doesn’t matter how heavy you think it is. That lid can be removed, whether it be guilt and shame, or the negative words that have been spoken over you, or the weight of current circumstances. What I’m trying to say is, you’re not as boxed in as you think. &quo

"God has installed a reset button!"

  A thought by Shaun Nepstad from his book,  Don't Quit in the Dip  (p. 79). Worthy. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) And that is such a very good thought. Shaun says, "In 1 John 1:9, we read this promise: 'If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.'" He goes on, "Asking for forgiveness looks like this: God, I’m so sorry for going my own way. I confess I have allowed other things to come before You. Today, I’m reordering the list. Forgive me my sin and cleanse me. I’m putting You first again. Be specific. Invite Him to be Lord again. Then He will do something that is almost unexplainable. When you reset the order, He resets your heart. Resets your life to the manufacturer settings. He makes you brand-new." He then says, "In the dip, we’re looking for direction in life and feel so confused. When you reorder the list and make God firs

"We often find ourselves in a dip because one area got out of order."

A thought by Shaun Nepstad from his book,  Don't Quit in the Dip  (p. 76). Worthy. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) And that can be a too easy thing to do. Shaun says, "I spoke to a guy who claimed he was feeling far from God and didn’t know why. So I inquired about a few things. 'Are you praying?' He responded with his head down, 'No.' 'Are you reading the Bible?' 'No.' 'Are you in a small group of other believers where you encourage each other on a regular basis?' 'No.' "... I encouraged him: 'You’ve forgotten the basics and allowed things to get out of order, which brings confusion and the feeling like God is distant. But God didn’t move. You did.'" Shaun goes on, "It’s so easy for aspects of our lives to get out of order. We may start off focused and deliberate on doing first things first, but pretty soon Instagram invades the spot where we used to pray. Checki

"So many of us have had big dreams."

A thought by Shaun Nepstad from his book,  Don't Quit in the Dip  (p. 68). Worthy. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) That is so true! Shaun says, "Maybe you feel God has given you an amazing picture for your life. I love it when God opens a glimpse into His plan for our lives, but that excitement can quickly turn into frustration if we dive right into that plan without first understanding exactly where we are at the moment. If God gives a high school senior the dream to be a surgeon, he can’t just go running toward a scalpel and bribe his friends to lie down on the table for him to practice. He has to first recognize that it’s just the seed of a dream. Knowing where he is right now will help him determine the steps he needs to move toward that dream. If he circumvents this, that dream will die quickly… along with one of his practice patients!" So true! He goes on, "You will never know how to go for the dreams and visions God

"Isn’t it crazy how certain smells can take you back?"

A thought by Shaun Nepstad from his book,  Don't Quit in the Dip  (p. 61). Worthy. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Here is the background to this thought. This is after Jesus had been crucified and then resurrected and the Apostles hadn't known what to do so they went fishing, back to what they used to do. Shaun says, "On the beach, Jesus was cooking fish for breakfast over a fire/ You’ve heard of the Last Supper? I once heard Joseph Stowell call it the Last Breakfast. It wasn’t just your normal fire, though. If you look at the Greek language here, in which the New Testament is written, this fire was actually a charcoal fire. Why that detail? Well, there’s only one other place in the entire Bible where there was a charcoal fire—the fire where Peter denied Christ. Why would Jesus do this? Think about it: Isn’t it crazy how certain smells can take you back? You smell someone’s perfume that reminds you of your mom. You smell a certa