Skip to main content

“We want people to change, especially the crazy ones.”

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, People Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them the Keys (p. 57). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

We really do, don’t we?

Mike says, “Everything inside us wants them to be different. They’ve thrown us off our emotional set point, and we wonder if our emotions will ever get back in balance.”

Can you think of someone like that?

He goes on, “It’s a fine line between two ends of a continuum:
1.    Hope (that they’ll change) 
2.  Realism (knowing they might not)

“Both ends can exist together, which is why it’s possible to keep from being thrown too far from our emotional set point. When we’ve tried so many times to impact people’s lives with no results, it’s easy to give up. Realism acknowledges that it might not get better.

“But no matter how bad it gets, there’s always hope.”

He then says, “Brad and Linda have a twenty-five-year-old son who is the source of their pain. Their son has chosen a path that goes against the values and priorities they tried to instill in him, which strains their relationship. Conversation is shallow when they get together, and he seems to be making no progress in finding direction and purpose in his life. They pray for him, stay in contact with him, but have pretty much given up hope. To keep their sanity, they have accepted the fact that things probably won’t change.

“If they believe their son will always follow the same path, it’s a realistic perspective to protect their emotions. But it’s also realistic to know that God loves their son as much as they do (more, actually). They might be out of fuel, but God isn’t.

“That doesn’t mean the son is going to change. It simply means that God hasn’t given up and will be intimately involved with him throughout his whole life. Brad and Linda might not have reason to expect change in their son’s future, but they can trust God to always be working in his life.”

Mike then says, “That’s the difference between expectation and expectancy. With expectation, we’re waiting for something specific that we want to happen, and we’ll be disappointed if it doesn’t. With expectancy, we release our own agenda in a person’s life, allowing changes to happen that we can’t control.

“We can’t be the quarterback of another person’s life. But we can be members of his team, supporting and influencing him to become a better life player.”

And that is what God wants us to be.  So. will you still be a member of that person’s team, that person you thought of earlier?  Will you?

Yes, yes!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

“God does big things with small deeds.”

A thought by Max Lucado (2011-05-02) from his book, Cure for the Common Life (p. 115). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) I don’t know how you feel about what you are doing and how it can make a difference.   You may feel that it is so small and not even worth the effort. Max says, “Begin. Just begin! What seems small to you might be huge to someone else. Just ask Bohn Fawkes. During World War II, he piloted a B-17. On one mission he sustained flak from Nazi antiaircraft guns. Even though his gas tanks were hit, the plane did not explode, and Fawkes was able to land the plane. “On the morning following the raid, Fawkes asked his crew chief for the German shell. He wanted to keep a souvenir of his incredible good fortune. The crew chief explained that not just one but eleven shells had been found in the gas tanks, none of which had exploded. “Technicians opened the missiles and found them void of explosive cha...

“There’s a big difference between building a castle and building a kingdom.”

A thought by Bob Goff from his book, Everybody, Always: Becoming Love in a World Full of Setbacks and Difficult People ( p. 41). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)   Have you ever built a sand castle or maybe a Lego castle?   Have you? Bob says, “We actually build castles all the time, out of our jobs and our families and the things we’ve purchased. Sometimes we even make them out of each other. Some of these castles are impressive too. Lots of people come to admire what we’ve built over the course of our lives and tell us what great castles we have. But Jesus told His friends we weren’t supposed to spend our lives building castles. He said He wanted us to build a kingdom, and there’s a big difference between building a castle and building a kingdom.” Bob goes on, “You see, castles have moats to keep creepy people out, but kingdoms have bridges to let everyone in. Castles have dungeons for people who ha...

"Lie 2: The more you worry about it, the better your odds of avoiding it."

A thought by Louie Giglio in his book,   Winning the War on Worry    (p. 5). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Here is another lie that the Enemy uses with us. And Louie says, "This is a tricky lie. Yes, we often have cause for concern and preparation. But the Enemy wants you to believe that if you worry or fret over a certain outcome long enough, you can keep something bad from happening." But this is so important to realize. He says, "The reality is worrying has never once prevented something negative from happening. Planning might. Prayer has. But worry never will." He continues, "The Enemy tells you that by worrying about a situation (or every situation) you can make your tomorrow better. Really, worry just robs you of today. Jesus implored us: 'I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body mor...