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“Adventure sounds like the opposite of security, but it actually partners with it.”

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, Dealing with the Elephant in the Room: Moving from Tough Conversations to Healthy Communication (p. 48). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

Adventure and security are two needs that are present in just about every relationship.

Mike says, “Adventure has to do with leaving our comfort zones. If we spend a lot of time in our comfort zones, we become . . . well, comfortable. There’s no incentive to explore outside the familiar.

“Most growth happens when we move outside our comfort zones. That takes effort and risk. People with a high need for adventure can’t wait to see what is out there that they’ve never experienced before. They’re innately curious and want to move ahead. People with a low need for adventure tend to fear the unknown. Part of them wants to explore, but they want to do it in a safe environment.”

He goes on, “Low adventure people want to watch the safari from the tour bus. High adventure people want to ride the cheetah. There’s an obvious chance of conflict when we put those two people together. Both can get frustrated with the other because they’re moving either too fast or too slow. It takes a deep level of communication to understand each other’s position. When a person feels they’ve been genuinely listened to and heard, they trust the other person and are willing to choose a creative solution that works for both of them.”

He says, “I know one couple who used to dread vacations together. Both wanted to relax, but one relaxed by being on the move the entire trip, while the other wanted to sit on the beach and read. One wanted to go somewhere new every year, while the other wanted to revisit the familiar places to enjoy them again. They considered taking separate vacations but realized that would only put a deeper wedge between them. Instead, they worked together to create trips in which they could enjoy each other while finding creative ways to meet each other’s needs.

“One year, they saved for a river cruise in Europe. Each day there were stops in different cities where they could explore the culture and taste the cuisine for a few hours. When it was time for the ship to continue the journey, one spouse relaxed and read in the stateroom and watched the castles they were passing. The other went to the top deck to take part in organized activities. They were able to enjoy a world-class vacation that met each of their needs.”

Please don’t minimize the need for adventure in your life and those around you.  Do you know someone who has a great desire for adventure?   Maybe it is you?  Will you strive in your own way to make each day an adventure?  Will you?

Yes, yes!
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