“Science confirms that getting to the next level is 100 percent dependent on relationship.”

A thought by Henry Cloud, from his book,  The Power of the Other   (p.13). Harper Business. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

And that is a very good thing.

Henry says, “But . . . the relationship must be the right kind of relationship, more than just hanging out with pals. The relationship must provide very specific functions and very specific energy; it must deliver very specific constructive experiences and encode very specific information within the brains of those in the relationship. The right kinds of relationships wire us for resilience and success.”

He goes on, “Daniel Siegel is a professor at UCLA and a leading neurobiologist. He is one of the scientists whose studies of the brain help elucidate how it interfaces with the aspects of life that determine our success: ​

·      The clinical arena: how we feel, think, and behave;

·     ​The relational arena: how we relate to others;

·      and ​The performance arena: how we perform and what we achieve.”

Henry continues, “Siegel, who has studied the formation of the brain and mind in the context of relationships, sums up their curative power better than anyone I know. He pulls all of the research together with a threefold focus, which he refers to as the triangle of well-being, in his Pocket Guide to Interpersonal Neurobiology: An Integrative Handbook of the Mind (New York: Norton, 2012).

“This triangle of well-being determines how we do in the areas of life that matter to us daily—whether or not the Navy SEAL finishes the swim, whether or not a marriage is enriching and happy, whether or not the CEO is able to lead a team, whether or not a child develops intellectually, whether or not you are able to fight off adversity and be resilient. The three elements that form the triangle of well-being work together to build, drive, create, and regulate our functioning and performance. What are the three? They are our brain/body (the physical), our relational connections, and our minds, which regulate the energy and information needed to live and perform.”

He then says, “Siegel describes the triangle as a ‘process . . . that regulates the flow of energy and information within our social interactions and our neural firing patterns . . . it is not brain or relationships . . . it is a system that entails the flow of energy and information within the brain and between one another.’ Our brain works in the context of relationships, and develops a regulating mind that controls the flow of our energy and the information that drives everything. We are connected in such ways that the reality of how we function always involves these three elements: our physical makeup, our relationships, and our minds.”

Now this is the way God created us. You see, we really do need each other. We really do. So how are your relationships going during this season we are living in? You see, don’t you, how important they are in determining how we are handling it and that they need to be the right kind?

Yes, yes!