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“Bonding is the ability to establish an emotional attachment to another person.”

A thought by Henry Cloud, from his book, Changes That Heal (p. 57). Zondervan. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

You might ask, what is bonding?

Henry says, “It’s the ability to relate to another on the deepest level. When two people have a bond with each other, they share their deepest thoughts, dreams, and feelings with each other with no fear that they will be rejected by the other person.”

Later Henry says, “Bonding is one of the most basic and foundational ideas in life and the universe. It is a basic human need. God created us with a hunger for relationship—for relationship with him and with people. At our very core, we are relational beings.

“Without a solid, bonded relationship, the human soul will become mired in psychological and emotional problems. The soul cannot prosper without being connected to others. No matter what characteristics we possess, or what accomplishments we amass, without solid emotional connectedness, without bonding to God and other humans, we. . . will suffer sickness of the soul. Nothing grows anywhere in God’s universe apart from a source of strength and nutrition. The Bible frequently pictures growth using plants. Think about how plants grow. They must be connected to something outside themselves. The stalk is connected to the roots, which in turn are buried in the soil where they draw moisture and nutrients up into the stalk; the stalk is also connected to the branches, which are connected to the leaves, which catch the sunlight and transform its radiant energy into a chemical energy that feeds the plant.

“Probably the most well-known passage using this plant imagery is found in John 15 where Jesus says, ‘I am the vine, you are the branches. Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, because apart from me you can do nothing. Whoever does not abide in me is thrown away like a branch and withers’ (vv. 5–6 NRSV). In verse 12, Jesus points out the importance of our staying in relationship to one another: ‘This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.’”

Henry then says, “Without such connectedness to God and others, we will slowly wither and die, just as a branch cut off from its vine.”

Because of this “lack of emotional connectedness," many are led into depressions so bottomless that they cry out for help.  Does this resonate with you about yourself or someone else?  You realize don’t you that we really do need each other? 

Yes, yes!
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