“Unkindness kills romance. Instantly.”

A thought by Andy Stanley (2015-01-06) from his book, The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating (p. 80). Zondervan. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

I know that this is a thought that we all agree with don’t we? Now if they are kind that sparks something within you. This is one area that we see what it means to embrace love as a verb. I Corinthians 13:4 in the Bible says, “Love is kind.”

Andy says, “To be kind is to leverage one’s strength on behalf of another. When we’re kind, we put our strength, abilities, and resources on loan to someone who lacks them. When you’re kind, you put you at someone’s disposal. Kindness is powerful. Kindness is a decision. It’s the decision to do for others what they cannot in that moment do for themselves. Kindness, in its purest form, is unconditional. It’s not a means to a personal end. The goal of kindness is to benefit the person to whom it’s extended. Kindness is love’s response to weakness. Kindness is perhaps the most important component in a romantic relationship.”

He then says, “Pay close attention to how a potential future partner responds to those he or she perceives as weak. Eventually he or she will perceive a weakness in you. You will expect that potential partner to lean in and loan you some strength. But that will only happen if said person has developed the habit of opting for kindness in the face of weakness. And while I’m delving into your personal life, unkindness doesn’t dissipate with the introduction of sex or a ring. In fact, odds are good, it will escalate. People who use kindness as a means to an end are often mean in the end.”

Start today at being kind. Make it a part of how you treat people. Remember, if you want to stay in love, then embrace love as a verb and love is kind. Kindness is not a weakness, kindness is love in action.

So how kind are you?

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