A thought by John Ortberg (2012-08-07) from his
book, Who Is This Man?: TheUnpredictable Impact of the Inescapable Jesus (p. 143). Zondervan. Kindle
Edition. (Click on the title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)
But we use any excuse
we can to strive to find that right person.
We thought this person we married was the right one until we lived with
them for a while and we found that we were incompatible. She/he didn’t always agree with me and give
me what I want. That isn’t
incompatibility that is selfishness.
John quotes G. K.
Chesterton who wrote “I have known many happy marriages, but never a compatible
one. The whole aim of marriage is to fight through and survive the instant when
incompatibility becomes unquestionable. For a man and a woman, as such, are
incompatible.”
Andy Stanley in his
new book, The New Rules for Love, Sex,and Dating says, “Looking for
the right person is a great idea as long as you don’t assume that finding the
right person ensures everything will be all right. Looking for the right person
is essential; it’s just not enough. There’s more to a satisfying relationship
than finding the right person.”
And that is where the
commitment comes in. Those vows, they are
there to hold you steady during the growing part of the relationship with your
spouse. Yes there are times that we
want to run but we made those vows. Yes
there is great adversity but we made those vows before God and man. But they are different. Yes but you made those vows and you are a
person of your word.
Yes, a relationship
between a man and women can be very difficult but it is worth it if you
strive to learn and to give and to minister and to love and to grow.
I am so glad that I didn’t
give in to the incompatibility excuse and stayed with it. Margaret and I are different in many ways but
that is a part of the adventure of growing older together. Also remember God hasn’t used that as an
excuse in His relationship with us.
So what are you learning
to accept in your spouse?
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