"Often it is difficult for us to admit that our hurt occurred."

 

A thought by H. Norman Wright from his book, When the Past Won't Let You Go (p. 10). Harvest House Publishers. Kindle Edition.  (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.)

This can be so true.

Norman says, "I’ve heard a number of reasons why some don’t want to face their old wounds. 

• Some don’t want to admit that what happened to them actually happened. 

• Some believe if they admit to the hurt and pain of the past, they are in some way different or damaged and not useful to others. They want to see themselves as okay, but they don’t. They definitely don’t want others to know to avoid being judged or offered unwanted advice. 

• Some are afraid to confront the painful past. That’s understandable. There is fear that experiencing the pain again might be too much to bear. 

• There is also the fear that confronting the past may require change, which opens the door to failure."

He goes on, "The reality is that to move from being a yesterday person to a tomorrow person, we need to admit we were hurt, face it, describe it, and tell our stories. This also means facing what our hurt has turned into—anger.

He later says, "Many of us have pasts so wracked with pain that our pattern of life is devoted to playing it safe and, thus, not run the risk of being hurt again. We find ways to create a safe distance and avoid losses, as well as build walls to keep others out. The ways we manifest this vary. We may be aloof, defensive, negative, sarcastic, cynical, or very selective in what we share. We may relate with some people, but we don’t make ourselves vulnerable. This brings to mind a phrase in Why Am I Afraid to Tell You Who I Am? by Father John Powell: 'I’m afraid to tell you who I am because if I tell you who I am you might not like who I am and that’s all I’ve got.'

"Conversely, our pain may cause us to respond in a totally different way. We may be so desperate for closeness that we go to any extreme to have this false or exaggerated intimacy be a part of our life. We make choices that aren’t healthy."

He then says, "The hurts of the past keep us from the joy of the present and the future."

And that can be so true, can't it? Thank You, God that our past is past and the greatest present is your presence and You are present. 

Yes, yes!