"A lot of us are chronic overexplainers."

A thought by Lisa Whittle from her book, Jesus Over Everything (p. 19). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.)

Would you explain that?

Lisa says, "We feel our first stab at words wasn’t good. What we are saying doesn’t feel adequate. We may be trying to couch a hard truth that needs to be said, so we say it . . . and then say it again, and again, and maybe again, if we feel it necessary. My friend Tracy tells me she is learning that 'it’s okay to say no without giving all the reasons.' That 'no is a complete sentence.' A big and hard-fought amen to that. Not everyone needs to know why you can’t come to that dinner party—maybe your daughter has revealed to you something difficult, and you are not in a good place to go and pretend when your heart is in pain. It’s okay not to go, and it’s okay to say you aren’t coming, but thank you, and leave it at that. And on that note, may we all be better accepters without demanding explanations."

She then says, "Overexplaining is not simply being at a loss for good words, though I think it’s what we feel at the time that drives us to put more words forward. It’s about not feeling safe enough with each other to believe the other person won’t fill in the gaps of a story he or she doesn’t know. And it’s about our need to control a narrative to ensure that doesn’t happen. But what if we trusted God enough to help us heal from our micro-management of all that? What if we stopped stepping in and complicating things before He managed it in His time? The body of Christ needs Him in charge of our interactions to cover our silences and disappointments and bring understanding versus judgment—the way of unity. In that place, we can then trust that our lack of explaining will be met with understanding over the judgment we often feel."

And we need Christ in our interactions, don't we?

Yes, yes!

Comments

“There’s a big difference between building a castle and building a kingdom.”

A thought by Bob Goff from his book, Everybody, Always: Becoming Love in a World Full of Setbacks and Difficult People ( p. 41). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Have you ever built a sand castle or maybe a Lego castle? Have you? Bob says, “We actually build castles all the time, out of our jobs and our families and the things we’ve purchased. Sometimes we even make them out of each other. Some of these castles are impressive too. Lots of people come to admire what we’ve built over the course of our lives and tell us what great castles we have. But Jesus told His friends we weren’t supposed to spend our lives building castles. He said He wanted us to build a kingdom, and there’s a big difference between building a castle and building a kingdom.” Bob goes on, “You see, castles have moats to keep creepy people out, but kingdoms have bridges to let everyone in. Castles have dungeons for people who ha...

“God does big things with small deeds.”

A thought by Max Lucado (2011-05-02) from his book, Cure for the Common Life (p. 115). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) I don’t know how you feel about what you are doing and how it can make a difference. You may feel that it is so small and not even worth the effort. Max says, “Begin. Just begin! What seems small to you might be huge to someone else. Just ask Bohn Fawkes. During World War II, he piloted a B-17. On one mission he sustained flak from Nazi antiaircraft guns. Even though his gas tanks were hit, the plane did not explode, and Fawkes was able to land the plane. “On the morning following the raid, Fawkes asked his crew chief for the German shell. He wanted to keep a souvenir of his incredible good fortune. The crew chief explained that not just one but eleven shells had been found in the gas tanks, none of which had exploded. “Technicians opened the missiles and found them void of explosive cha...

"Lie 2: The more you worry about it, the better your odds of avoiding it."

A thought by Louie Giglio in his book, Winning the War on Worry (p. 5). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon to buy the book.) Here is another lie that the Enemy uses with us. And Louie says, "This is a tricky lie. Yes, we often have cause for concern and preparation. But the Enemy wants you to believe that if you worry or fret over a certain outcome long enough, you can keep something bad from happening." But this is so important to realize. He says, "The reality is worrying has never once prevented something negative from happening. Planning might. Prayer has. But worry never will." He continues, "The Enemy tells you that by worrying about a situation (or every situation) you can make your tomorrow better. Really, worry just robs you of today. Jesus implored us: 'I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body mor...

Just Continue That Thought...

Search This Blog