Just Continue That Thought...

A thought by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend from their book, I t's Not My Fault . (pg. 56) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Oh no, that can’t be true, can it? John says, “It is not an aspect of timid people who see themselves as trash. Humility is the ability to see yourself and your situation clearly, for good and for bad. Humble people don’t care if what they do or think makes them look like a hero or a bad guy. They want to get at the heart of the matter.” John goes on, “I had a friend… controlled by negative thinking patterns that kept him from asking out a woman he was attracted to. He said, ‘She wouldn’t go for a guy like me; she’s a total goddess and I’m pretty mediocre.’ After a few attempts to encourage him, I realized my folly. I realized I was heading the wrong direction, and said, ‘Actually, in a way, that could be a pride issue for you.’ “‘What?’ he said, not expecting that kin...

A thought by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend from their book, It's Not My Fault . (pg. 54) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Now, why is that important? The guys say, “No problem was ever solved, no goal ever reached without looking at the situation squarely with no editing or reframing.” They go on, “Don’t be afraid to say, I need to know what is true, not what I hope is true. That is your sure path. Look for raw, unvarnished reality, not the prepackaged, politically acceptable type. “Suppose you had extensive diagnostic testing, and the tests showed clearly that you need heart bypass surgery. That’s a big deal. You see your doctor for his recommendation, and he says, ‘The surgery route just seems so serious and harsh. Why don’t you take a couple of aspirin and get a good night’s sleep instead?’ The good doctor is trying to save you from discomfort. The simple prescription he offers is cer...

A thought by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend from their book, It's Not My Fault . (pg. 45) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Maybe it has been a while since you have heard these two words.   John says, “The active voice connotes that someone is doing something; the passive voice indicates that something is being done.”   Ok, that is what they mean. John says, “They just convey different realities. But the problem comes when people use passive language to explain their choices in such a way that they disown responsibility, ownership, and empowerment . They have selected a way of thinking and communicating to others that hampers their ability to take charge and take action to get what they need.” He goes on, “Let’s look at some examples of using passive language, and how it could be recast in ways more helpful in meeting your goals:   “• I was prevented from getting to the meeting on...