“The number-one reason most people lose arguments is not because they’re wrong.”

A thought by John C. Maxwell (2013-02-15) from his book, Be A People Person: Effective Leadership Through Effective Relationships (p. 96). David C. Cook. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title of the book to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

A person can be right and still loose an argument. John says, “It’s because they don’t know when to quit.”

He goes on, “There is a moment when you have marshaled all of the factual and emotional issues in your favor and have expressed them as best you can. If you continue to hammer away, you do nothing but build resentment in the person you are trying to persuade.”

I’ve found in arguments with my wife and yes we have disagreements. Back to the point, the way we stop arguments is by one of us stopping in our well thought out argument and starting to listen, really listen to what the other person is saying. When one does that it opens the door for the other one to really express their feeling and then they also stop and want to hear the other side. It is no longer a conflict but a conversation between two people who love and respect each other even though they disagree.

But back to John’s point, he says, “There is great dignity in simplicity. Most of the immortal works of literature not only have the brilliance of brevity but also the dignity of simplicity. The Lord’s Prayer consists of only fifty-seven words, none more than three syllables. The Declaration of Independence, which revolutionized the thinking of the New World, can be read by a fourth-grader in less than five minutes. Simplicity is eloquent; it speaks loud and clear without insulting the intelligence of the listener.”

Very good point. The longer you go the less they hear and the more agitated they can get.

So do you go on and on in stating your side?

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