A
thought by John C. Maxwell (2013-02-15) from his book, Be A People Person: Effective Leadership Through Effective Relationships
(p. 157). David C. Cook. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title of the book to
go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)
There will
be times that we need to confront as a parent, as a boss or as a friend. There
are also times that you and I need to be confronted. John gives some good thoughts on this.
John says,
“Always give confrontation the ‘sandwich treatment.’ Sandwich the criticism
between praise at the beginning and encouragement at the end. To leave a
discouraged person without hope is cruel and vindictive. Goethe, the German
poet, said, ‘Correction does much, but encouragement does more. Encouragement
after censure is as the sun after a shower.’”
That is very
good.
John then
says, “In my effort to simplify things as much as possible, I have come up with
one-word descriptions of the various ways people will respond to confrontation:
BYE. The
‘bye’ people never profit from confrontation; they don’t hang around long
enough. Their egos are too fragile.
SPY. Spies
become suspicious of everyone. They begin an investigation to find out who in
the organization is out to get them. Often they will avoid risking a failure
again.
FRY. Some
people will simply get mad and either fly of the handle or do a slow burn.
LIE. The
liar has an excuse for every mistake. Therefore he never faces up to the
reality of his situation.
CRY.
Crybabies are overly sensitive and become hurt by confrontation. Unlike the
‘bye’ people, criers hang around in hopes that people will see how mistreated
they are and sympathize with them. They have a martyr complex.
SIGH. These
people have a ‘That’s-too-bad-but-there’s-nothing-I-can-do-about-it’ attitude.
They don’t accept any responsibility for making right the wrong.
FLY. This
category of people takes criticism and flies with it. They learn from it and
become better because of it.”
Such good
advice.
So which
category are you in when you are confronted?
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