“Connecting with people one-on-one is more important than being able to do it in a group or with an audience.”

A thought by John C. Maxwell from his book, Everyone Communicates, Few Connect. (p.20). HarpersCollins Leadership Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

It is so important.

John says, “Why? Because 80 to 90 percent of all connecting occurs on this level, and this is where you connect with the people who are most important to you.

“How good are you at connecting with friends, family, colleagues, and coworkers? To increase your influence one-on-one:

• Talk more about the other person and less about yourself. Prepare two or three questions you can ask someone before a meeting or social gathering.

• Bring something of value, such as a helpful quote, story, book, or CD, to give to someone when you get together.

• At the close of a conversation, ask if there is anything you can do to help them and then follow through. Acts of servanthood have a resounding impact that live longer than words.”

Now connecting in a group is also important.

John says, “To connect with a group, you must take initiative with the people in the group. To do that, do the following:

• Look for ways to compliment people in the group for their ideas and actions.

• Look for ways to add value to people in the group and what they’re doing.

• Don’t take credit when the group succeeds, and don’t cast blame when it fails.

• Find ways to help the group celebrate successes together.”

And then some thoughts on connecting with an audience.

John also says, “One of the best ways to learn how to connect with an audience is to observe communicators who are good at it. Learn from them and adopt what you can into your own style. Meanwhile, here are four things you can do to connect with an audience:

• Let your listeners know that you are excited to be with them.

• Communicate that you desire to add value to them.

• Let them know how they or their organization add value to you. Tell them that your time with them is your highest priority that day.”

Such good practical advice.  See, we can learn how to connect but will we? 

Yes, yes!