Just Continue That Thought...

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, Dealing with the Elephant in the Room: Moving from Tough Conversations to Healthy Communication (p. 48). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Adventure and security are two needs that are present in just about every relationship. Mike says, “Adventure has to do with leaving our comfort zones. If we spend a lot of time in our comfort zones, we become . . . well, comfortable. There’s no incentive to explore outside the familiar. “Most growth happens when we move outside our comfort zones. That takes effort and risk. People with a high need for adventure can’t wait to see what is out there that they’ve never experienced before. They’re innately curious and want to move ahead. People with a low need for adventure tend to fear the unknown. Part of them wants to explore, but they want to do it in a safe environment.” He goes on, “Low adventure people want to watch th

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, Dealing with the Elephant in the Room: Moving from Tough Conversations to Healthy Communication (p. 47). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) That is the truth! Mike says, “We want to know what we can count on so we have a secure anchor point for exploring the future. It’s like standing on a crowded bus or train. When it stops suddenly, people instinctively grab for a railing to hang on to. They trust that it won’t go anywhere. He continues, “Let’s say I have a checking account and a savings account at my bank. Let’s also say that my checking account is low. There’s enough to pay the bills this month but nothing left over for frills or emergencies.   “Then the refrigerator breaks. If I have ten dollars in my savings account, I’m going to be pretty stressed about the fridge. If I have one hundred thousand dollars in my savings account, I’m going to feel a lot be

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, Dealing with the Elephant in the Room: Moving from Tough Conversations to Healthy Communication (p. 44). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) We really do want people to like us, don’t we? Mike says, “We want people to think highly of us, seeing us as people of high character and integrity. We want to be seen as people who really care. “There are two ways to do that: “1. We can do the things high-character, caring people do—hoping that people will think we actually have high character. “2. We can work on our character underground and in the dark, where nobody sees. We can become people of true character on the inside. Over time, that character will begin to grow and flourish on the outside.” Mike goes on, “We can’t fake character. If we’re unhealthy on the inside, it’ll begin to show on the outside over time. Plus, faking it is a lot of work. Real chara