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“Don’t spend your life feeling sorry for yourself.”


A thought by Kyle Idleman from his book, Don't Give Up (p. 64). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

I know, I know, it’s not you or me.  But I really do have it rough.

Kyle says, “One of the ways you know it may be time to stop feeling sorry for yourself is that you feel defensive when some meddling book pipes up and tells you to stop feeling sorry for yourself.

“When people tell you to stop feeling sorry for yourself, it’s hurtful. And you start feeling sorry for yourself. If this sounds like you, stay with me.”

He goes on, “People who pity themselves and live with a victim mentality rarely realize it. That’s especially true when the people around them are constantly reinforcing it. Well-meaning friends and family often reinforce a victim mentality because they see our pain and try to comfort us with the nearest tools in their emotional toolshed: sympathy and pity. That tough love tool is always in the very back of the shed, where it’s nearly impossible to get to.

“A victim mentality can be hard to self-diagnose because it’s not always pervasive. You may not be one to throw an all-encompassing pity party, but it’s just possible you’re struggling with a stubborn little pocket of victim mentality. Perhaps there’s a specific area of your life you assume can never change. In that area, instead of taking personal responsibility, you blame others. What is it? Your marriage? Career? Parenting? Financial situation? An addiction? Inability to maintain a healthy relationship?

“One way to identify an area where you have a victim mentality is to pinpoint an area of your life where you’re tempted to give up.”

The whole thought that Kyle said was, “Don’t spend your life feeling sorry for yourself. As long as you decide to see yourself as a victim, you won’t experience the taste of victory.”

And that is what we want, isn’t it?

Yes, yes!
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