“Develop the ability to monitor yourself.”

A thought by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend from their book, It's Not My Fault. (pg. 57) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

I know, I know, we like to monitor other people, don’t we?

John says, “Observe what you do, why you do it, and when you do it. As Dr. Howard Hendricks, one of my favorite professors used to say, ‘Become a student of yourself.’ That is a trait of successful people, and they achieve success because they are able to confront the truth about themselves and get over their inaccurate and unhelpful thinking patterns.”

He goes on, “When I consult with people who come to me with problems, I often have them try this exercise. ‘Imagine that you are in two places at once: one ‘“you”’ is in a real interaction with someone else, discussing some goal or problem. The second ‘“you”’  is floating above, near the ceiling, looking at the interaction of the other you and learning from it. After you leave the conversation, you can use that floating, observing ‘“you”’  to review what happened and consider what you could have done differently.’

“By employing this exercise, you may learn that you give up power and choice very easily when someone has an objection to your idea. Or that you come down on yourself quickly when you are confronted. Or that you go into blame and excuses when you face a problem.

“Such information is pure gold! Rooting out the truth about yourself may not be fun, but it will reap great rewards for you, for it allows you to see and own what you need to do and change. Without this ability, people are forced to interpret every bump in the road as fate, bad luck, or bad people. Nothing is their own fault. They are then rendered helpless and hopeless because it’s all beyond their control. But the self-observant person who takes ownership of his future is way ahead of the pack.”

I was thinking yesterday about a situation where I didn’t like the way I had responded.  So, I chose a different response in almost the same situation today.  It is so good to develop the ability to monitor yourself, isn’t it? 

Yes, yes!