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“I want to control my emotions, not allow them to control me.”

A thought by John C. Maxwell (2017-03-07) from his book, No Limits: Blow the CAP Off Your Capacity (p. 69). Center Street. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

It is so easy to let our emotions control us, isn’t it? 

John says, “I once saw a story about a guy who got to play a round of golf with PGA great Sam Snead. On the first hole, Snead made a terrible score, a seven— three strokes over par. As they exited the green to go to the next hole, Snead was unruffled. ‘That’s why we play eighteen holes,’ he said. His round ended that day four under par. He didn’t allow a low to control his emotions or his game.”

John goes on, “In my early career as a leader, one of my mentors said, ‘There are not two good consecutive days in a leader’s life.’ How true. After almost seventy years of life, I might even say there are not two good consecutive days in any person’s life. Every day contains something negative that threatens to wear us down emotionally.

“You probably know that we shouldn’t let those things take us down too low, or we can become discouraged. But are you also aware that you shouldn’t let your highs take you too high? Success has a tendency to make us complacent. We start to assume that everything will automatically stay good, so we might rest on our laurels and try to protect what we have. We can begin to feel entitled, lose perspective, and stop working hard. In the end, the highs and lows can rob us of reality and prevent our activity.”

He then gives some good advice on how to limit the impact of high and lows.  He says, “I practice the twenty-four-hour rule. Simply stated, I limit the effect of any emotional high or low to the twenty-four-hour period that follows the occurrence. If I have a great success, I celebrate for twenty-four hours. My team and I give each other high fives, we relive the victory, we compliment one another, but only for a day. Then we get back to work. We know that yesterday’s success won’t bring us tomorrow’s success. Today’s work does.”

He goes on, “Similarly, if I experience a great failure, I allow myself twenty-four hours to feel bad, sing the blues, wear black, and grieve. Toward the end of my emotional time limit, I’ll begin doing things that will bring me back to a level of emotional stability. I’ll spend time with a positive friend. Play a round of golf. Share with someone the lessons I learned in my downtime. Focus on the good things in my life. Or help someone.”

He says, “Action is the key. Whether dealing with highs or lows, taking action helps me to get back on track and regain control of my emotions. That’s how I stay emotionally strong.”

Some good practical advice.  You don’t have to let high and lows control you.


So, how do you handle your highs and lows?

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