A
thought by James MacDonald (2015-06-18) from his book, Lord, Change My Attitude: Before It's Too Late (p. 150). Moody
Publishers. Kindle Edition. (Click
on the title of the book to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)
You may then
ask, what do I do when there is a serious issue?
James says, “Failure
to take action will produce big fallout. In those instances, love does not sit
passively by. ‘I love him, so I won’t upset him.’ Wrong! Love takes action on things
that are major. You say, ‘What’s major?’”
James gives
three guidelines to determine what are major things where love means taking
action:
“1. Is this
a critical path? If failure to take action will produce major fallout, biblical
love is on the move. If it’s a major doctrinal error, a case of marital
unfaithfulness, a criminal act, or an abusive behavior, please don’t collect
stories for ten years and sit passively by. Step up! Get involved! Say
something! Love takes action. If the person you love is involved in sin that could
destroy him or someone else, it’s a critical path— it’s major— and therefore
love will get involved.”
Then, “2. Is
the problem chronic? If you see the same thing happening over and over, it
doesn’t have to be big to get your love into gear. The Song of Solomon says
it’s the ‘little foxes that spoil the vines’ (2: 15 NKJV). ‘Smaller things’
call for action, too, if they’re part of a chronic pattern. If you have
observed a behavior repeated many times, it invites a loving response. A gentle
word of correction can bear great fruit in the loved one’s life. To say to
someone, ‘Is it possible that you have a problem with gossip?’ that is loving a
person. So if you’re close enough to observe chronic patterns, you have to get
involved. You have to step up. On the majors, love takes action.”
And, “3.
Does your proximity imply responsibility? The third guideline after critical
path and chronic problem is the factor of close proximity. How close are you to
the situation? There are some things that we can live with in our neighbors and
our friends, but we can’t live with in our spouse and our kids. Right? Your
closeness to the situation may involve responsibility. For example, if I saw a friend
making a purchase that I thought was unwise and wondered if he could afford it,
I probably wouldn’t say anything, because that’s not really my business. But if
I saw my wife doing that— or more likely, if my wife saw me doing that— it
would be very appropriate for her to say, ‘We’re not buying that! We can’t
afford that! That’s just going to give us problems down the road.’”
I hope this
helps you if you are in a serious issue time with someone and you wonder if in love, you should say
something?
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