“We have been taught to believe that our feelings and emotions are determined by the events in our lives.”

A thought by David Stoop from his book, You Are What You Think (Kindle Location 217). Kindle
Edition.

An example would be, the reason why I am lonely is because I have no friends. The truth is many people are lonely with many friends and some aren’t lonely who have no friends. The having or not having friends doesn’t mean I am lonely.

I am unhappy because I am single. Many married people are also unhappy. I would feel deep satisfaction if I got that promotion. You get the promotion and you’re still not satisfied.

The key word in there is the word, believe. Our thoughts, our self-talk, our beliefs determine our feelings and emotions not the events in our lives.

Let’s say someone says they will call you and set up a time for the two of you to get together and you are very excited about it. But let’s say they don’t call you as soon as you think you should and you start feeling very hurt and very depressed. Now the fact that they haven’t called you isn’t the key to your emotions, it’s your belief why they haven’t called. “There must be something wrong with me.” “I wouldn’t want to be with me either.” “They found someone better to be with.” Or you could think, “Something must have come up.” “I wonder if something is wrong.” “They aren’t the kind of person to just forget, something has happened.” “They will call me, they said they would.”

Your response to the situation is the key to whether you take it personal or you give them the benefit of the doubt. Your self-talk determines whether they/you come out a winner or loser.

Your self-talk, what you believe determines your feelings about a situation.

You interview for a job and you don’t get it. If you believe that God works all things out for your good then that determines your lasting feelings about it. Yes you may be disappointed but not for very long because you believe that God is good and He has a plan for you.

So it is imperative to have good foundational beliefs about yourself and about your life. Your emotions depend on it.

So how are you feeling?

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