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“When you don’t want to tell those closest to you about a decision you are going to make, it’s probably not a good decision.”

A thought by Greg Darley (2010-11-15) from his book, Passion Is Not Enough: Four Elements to Change the World (Kindle Locations 914-915). Backstage Publishing. Kindle Edition.

There are people who have an opinion about what everyone else is doing but they don’t want anyone to have an opinion about what they are doing.  I have tended to not have an opinion but also don’t want anyone else’s opinion.  But Solomon in his book of Proverbs in the OT says that there is safety in many counselors.  He is saying that in making decisions don’t do it on your own.  

Now we do need to have confidence in our abilities but real confidence can withstand other views, other thoughts, and other experiences.  The truth is we have only lived the one life that we are living and that is the only experience we have and taping into other people’s experiences gives us a greater view of the situation.  Of course we may not want other perspectives.  They may just cloud the issue because we want to do what we want to do no matter if it is right or not.  And that is where many times the secrecy comes in.

 We also may not trust the other people to be open minded.  The decision may affect them so they won’t come from what is best for you but what is best for them.  I had to make a decision two different times to make a move that was best for me and my immediate family but that affected one time my parents and another time my wife’s parents.  We had to make those decisions separate from our parents. 

Still isolation can be a problem especially in leadership.  As Greg says, if you have people around you who have your best interest in mind it would be foolish to not use them.  If those closest to you are mature Christians then they are a gift from God to help you in key times in your life.  Don’t waist them.

So what decision are you keeping a secret?


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