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“Failure is an event…and with rare exceptions, is not fatal.”

A thought by Seth Godin (2011-03-01) in his book, Poke the Box (p. 66). The Domino Project. Kindle Edition.

That is so important for us to realize.  So many think that failure is a person, it is them.  I know there are parents who have made the horrible mistake to say to one of their kids, “you are a failure” but they are wrong.  Failure is not a person but an event.

Now there is a cycle in this.  The parent who says that may feel that about themselves.  A parent, a teacher, coach, some adult told them that they were a failure when they were young and they have carried that with them all their life.  Now here is the problem for kids.  They believe what adults tell them.  Kids don’t have the ability yet to distinguish right from wrong and they believe the adult knows more than they do so they must be right.

I have dealt with so many adults as a pastor who believe that failure is a person and lived with the pain of that untruth.  Yes, failure is real but failure is an event.  I have failed many times but I am not a failure. 

John Maxwell has written a great book on failure called, Failing Forward.  Within every failure there is a lesson to be learned.  We don’t waste it; we learn from it, we become better prepared to be successful the next time.

Also it is not fatal.  For a perfectionist they think it is.  They get that first B or even A- and they know that their life is over.  But it isn’t.  Now if they have a parent whose worth is built around where their child goes to college or whose love is conditional then they can feel like failure is fatal but parents can be wrong.  Hopefully as an adult you can accept and love this unpleaseable parent but not take your worth from them.

Again failure is an event not a person and it is only fatal if you let it be.

What about you?

Comments

  1. SchattiAugust 13, 2011 at 10:32 AM

    They say the words fast times you do not think so, unfortunately you can not rewind back to life but as a video film. For the reason you have to repeatedly explain and tell the people against his real feelings.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bill WilliamsAugust 13, 2011 at 2:39 PM

    you are right you can't go back but you can keep from repeating what they said. Also remember that God the Father loves you and believes in you. Keep repeating that instead of what they said!

    ReplyDelete

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