Just Continue That Thought...

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, P eople Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them the Keys (p. 49). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) That is only part of the thought.   Mike continues, “…and it’s filled with practical suggestions for making our own relationships work. Here are some examples: “-Don’t bring up issues that have already been dealt with in the past. (Prov. 17:9)  -Don’t stretch the truth, but be honest in your conversation. (Eph. 4:25) -If someone gets upset, don’t respond with anger. (Prov. 15:1; 25:15; 29:11) -Listen carefully, and don’t interrupt until you’ve really heard the other person. (Prov. 18:13) -Look for ways to encourage the other person. (1 Thess. 5:11) -Pick your battles; avoid arguing whenever possible. (Prov. 17:14) -Put energy into seeing things from the other person’s point of view. (Phil. 2:4) -Spend a lot more time listening than...

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, People Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them the Keys (p. 48). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) And that is so true? Mike says, “I say, ‘It’s going to be hot today.’ I grew up in Phoenix, so ‘hot’ means a dry 117 degrees. But if you’re from Atlanta or Anchorage, ‘hot’ takes on an entirely different meaning. “I’m looking through my lenses in a conversation. I know what I’m thinking (117 degrees), and I listen to you through those lenses, assuming that we’re on the same page. I’m listening to you, but it’s from my point of view.” He then says, “Here’s the problem: We’re both doing the same thing. “If both of us are assuming that we understand what the other person means with their words, we’re both going to be wrong. We see our side clearly and wonder, ‘It’s so obvious—why don’t they get it?’” He goes on, “The solution is to look throug...

A thought by Mike Bechtle from his book, People Can't Drive You Crazy If You Don't Give Them the Keys (p. 47). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) And we don’t like discomfort, do we? Mike says, “When we decide what a person is like during our first contact with them, we assume it’s accurate. We form those first impressions quickly, and we believe them to be true. “The problem is that we’re evaluating the person from a one-sided perspective. We don’t know their perspective, so we assume it’s the same as ours. It’s like we’re looking at things through our own lenses—our background, culture, education, experience, language. But the other person is doing the same thing, assuming that we’re thinking the same way they are. So, we both end up with unrealistic expectations of what the relationship will be like. He goes on, “Have you ever believed something about someone and then gained new informati...