Just Continue That Thought...

A thought by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend from their book, It's Not My Fault . (pg. 57) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) I know, I know, we like to monitor other people, don’t we? John says, “Observe what you do, why you do it, and when you do it. As Dr. Howard Hendricks, one of my favorite professors used to say, ‘Become a student of yourself.’ That is a trait of successful people, and they achieve success because they are able to confront the truth about themselves and get over their inaccurate and unhelpful thinking patterns.” He goes on, “When I consult with people who come to me with problems, I often have them try this exercise. ‘Imagine that you are in two places at once: one ‘“you”’ is in a real interaction with someone else, discussing some goal or problem. The second ‘“you”’   is floating above, near the ceiling, looking at the interaction of the other you and learning from it. After

A thought by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend from their book, I t's Not My Fault . (pg. 56) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Oh no, that can’t be true, can it? John says, “It is not an aspect of timid people who see themselves as trash. Humility is the ability to see yourself and your situation clearly, for good and for bad. Humble people don’t care if what they do or think makes them look like a hero or a bad guy. They want to get at the heart of the matter.” John goes on, “I had a friend… controlled by negative thinking patterns that kept him from asking out a woman he was attracted to. He said, ‘She wouldn’t go for a guy like me; she’s a total goddess and I’m pretty mediocre.’ After a few attempts to encourage him, I realized my folly. I realized I was heading the wrong direction, and said, ‘Actually, in a way, that could be a pride issue for you.’ “‘What?’ he said, not expecting that kin

A thought by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend from their book, It's Not My Fault . (pg. 45) Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition. (Click on the book title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.) Maybe it has been a while since you have heard these two words.   John says, “The active voice connotes that someone is doing something; the passive voice indicates that something is being done.”   Ok, that is what they mean. John says, “They just convey different realities. But the problem comes when people use passive language to explain their choices in such a way that they disown responsibility, ownership, and empowerment . They have selected a way of thinking and communicating to others that hampers their ability to take charge and take action to get what they need.” He goes on, “Let’s look at some examples of using passive language, and how it could be recast in ways more helpful in meeting your goals:   “• I was prevented from getting to the meeting on time by t