A thought by Daniel Goleman; Richard Boyatzis
& Annie McKee, (2013-07-23) from their book, Primal Leadership, With a New Preface by the Authors: Unleashing the Power of Emotional Intelligence (Kindle Location 356). Harvard Business
Review Press. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title to go to Amazon.com to buy
the book.)
I have found in my own approach to life, both of
those to be true. The people around me
always were afraid of what mood I was in and usually it was a bad one. Until I came to the place in my life that I realized
that I was hurting myself and those around me with my bad moods and started
striving to get control of my emotions and of my moods.
Here is what the writers here say, “Both good and
bad moods tend to perpetuate themselves, in part because they skew perceptions
and memories: When people feel upbeat, they see the positive light in a
situation and recall the good things about it, and when they feel bad, they
focus on the downside. Beyond this
perceptual skew, the stew of stress hormones secreted when a person is upset
takes hours to become reabsorbed in the body and fade away. That’s why a sour
relationship with a boss can leave a person a captive of that distress, with a
mind preoccupied and a body unable to calm itself: He got me so upset during
that meeting I couldn’t go to sleep for hours last night. As a result, we
naturally prefer being with people who are emotionally positive, in part
because they make us feel good.”
Take that to heart. Determine to be a person that uplifts people,
who others want to be around. How moody we
are goes a long way in determining if we are going to be effective in our
relationships or if we are going to be alone.
I choose to make a positive difference not a negative one.
Some would say, “That is just the way I am. I can’t be anything else.” I am one that decided that wasn’t the truth
and I over time changed.
How about you?
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