“Friend just doesn’t mean what it used to.”

A thought by Craig Groeschel (2015-10-27) from his book, #Struggles: Following Jesus in a Selfie-Centered World (p. 50). Zondervan. Kindle Edition. (Click on the title to go to Amazon.com to buy the book.)

Craig says, “It used to be that when someone said another person was a friend, you understood exactly what they meant. A friend was someone who shared common interests or bonds, someone you enjoyed being around, someone you did life with. But it’s not that simple anymore, is it? Now a friend can be someone you’ve never met IRL (in real life). Friends can be people who follow what you post on social media. If they follow you, but you don’t follow them back, that’s one kind of friend. If you follow them, but they don’t follow you, that’s another kind of friend. And if you both follow each other, that’s yet another kind of friend.”

Then Craig says, “Currently, the average American Facebook user has 338 Facebook friends. But surveys indicate that the average American has only two friends they consider to be close. As shocking as that statistic is, I think one is even sadder: 25 percent of Americans today say they have zero close friends! The #struggles are real. Does it really matter that you have 338 Facebook friends if you have no one to share your life with?... Technology supposedly saves us time, yet we seem to have even less time— at least for really relating to people. We have lots of online interactivity, but that doesn’t mean we have any personal intimacy.”

Now in this we feel we really don’t need this intimacy because of all these friends who give us all the Likes which affirms us but there is a problem in this.

Craig says, “We are meant to have deep, sometimes difficult feelings of loneliness to motivate us toward the kinds of contact with others that meet our deeper, long-term needs. Every time we seek instant affirmation, we ignore our basic human condition of loneliness and the opportunity of loneliness that drives us toward real friendship, real intimacy, first with God and then with others. We’re living for Likes, but we’re longing for love.”

So don’t settle. We really do need each other. As Craig says, “Presence is powerful.” So use your loneliness to break out and drive you toward real friendship, real intimacy, first with God and then with others..

Do you really need to do that?

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