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“Our relationship with God hinges on our relationship with other people—the two are inseparable.”

A thought by Andy Stanley, (2009-08-22) from his book, It Came from Within!: The Shocking Truth of What Lurks in the Heart (p. 115). Multnomah Books. Kindle Edition. This whole matter of relationships with others is so important because it affects our relationship with God.   Andy also says, “The truth is, you cannot resolve your differences with God if you are unwilling to resolve your differences with the people around you.”   Jesus made this clear when He said in Matthew 6:15 (NIV), “But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Relationships are so very important.   In some situations you may need some outside help.   There are people who have the ability to deal with conflict.   For men this many times is a problem.   They aren’t even honest with themselves that there is a problem so how in the world could they be honest with someone else.   They aren’t even honest with their wives or or their parents or their kids or that person

“Forgiveness is a gift we decide to give in spite of how we feel.”

A thought by Andy Stanley (2009-08-22) from his book, It Came from Within!: The Shocking Truth of What Lurks in the Heart (p. 145). Multnomah Books. Kindle Edition . That is so true.   I had a situation that happened in my life that in no way did I want to forgive. I wanted to play the martyr and get all I could out of it.   I mean they stabbed me in the back and then there were others who followed them closely behind and again that really hurt. But today I am at peace.   There is no pain at all when I think of that situation.   I am free because of forgiveness.    Now I have no relationship with this person today because of some evil that they did to someone close to me but I am free.   Have I forgiven them for what they did to the other person?   No, I haven’t.   The evil that they did was not toward me so what they did was not up to me to forgive them.   I am not the one to forgive them.   There are some acts that the justice of God takes over. But I am free fro

“All relationships have failings, but all relationships don’t have to fail.”

A thought by Leonard Sweet, (2012-03-13) from his book, What Matters Most: How We Got the Point but Missed the Person (Kindle Location 2350). Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition. That is sure true.   That is where grace, love and forgiveness come in.   In every relationship there will be pain because no one is perfect. I was reading yesterday about how Peter denied He knew Jesus.   Here Jesus was going through the most difficult time that anyone has ever gone through and one of His closest friends denied that he even knew Him.   How have you handled rejection from your closest friend?   Well after Jesus had been killed and then resurrected, one of the first people He came to was Peter.   He still loved Him.   The relationship had a failing but He knew it didn’t have to fail. What are your expectations of your friends?   Do you expect perfection?   Oh we want grace because we are not perfect but we demand justice because they should be?   Somehow we need to understand

“We often confuse the heart of compassion that requires a response with the feeling of sympathy that remains idle.”

A thought by Brandon Hatmaker, (2011-10-18) from his book, Barefoot Church: Serving the Least in a Consumer Culture (p. 34). Zondervan. Kindle Edition. I was just reading a story about Jesus over in the 20 th chapter of Matthew in the New Testament.   It seems that He and His disciples were leaving this particular town and a crowd was following them.   And a couple of blind men disturbed the group and the crowd rebuked them and told them to be quite.   But they continued yelling and Jesus finally stopped and asked them what they wanted and they said, “We want our sight.” Now I’m sure these guys had been there for a long time and the sympathy of the crowd who walked by them every day turned to annoyance and then ignoring them.   But these two blind men had heard that Jesus was going by and they shouted, “Have mercy on us” and it says that Jesus didn’t have sympathy but He had compassion on them and touched their eyes and immediately they received their sight and followed Him

“True relationships with others decenter the self.”

A thought by Leonard Sweet, (2012-03-13) from his book, What Matters Most: How We Got the Point but Missed the Person (Kindle Locations 2627-2628). Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition . I wonder if one of the major problems we have at making a commitment with someone else is because we have to lessen the love of our life which is ourselves.   And there is so much we have to give up in order to do that. I have been noticing again what it means for a couple to have a new baby come to live with them.   I mean that other person demands that you decenter yourself.   To those of us who are married and those of us who are parents it is totally worth it.   And to those whose relationships are all based upon themself and those whose children take second place in their world they have totally missed out on the beauty, excitement and adventure of life with someone else.   I am sorry; if I am the love of my life then I have deprived my life from really living.   There is nothing

“When what motivates you lines up with what satisfies you, it is a powerful combination.”

A thought by John C. Maxwell, (2012-10-02) from his book, The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth: Live Them and Reach Your Potentia l (pp. 23-24). Center Street. Kindle Edition . Rick Warren says that God has given us a SHAPE.   S – Your Spiritual Gifts, Heart – Your passion, A – Your Abilities, P – Your Personality, E – Your Experiences.   Your SHAPE tells you what God created you to do.   Another way to say SHAPE is to call it your Sweet Spot.   Now there is a Sweet Spot on a baseball bat and also a golf club and when you hit the baseball or golf ball on the Sweet Spot the ball will go farther than you could imagine.   You hit the Sweet Spot. When you are working in your Sweet Spot you will be energized but when you are working in anything other than your Sweet Spot, your SHAPE, then your task will de-energize you.   That is why so many people are not energized in what they do because they are doing what they do for the wrong reason.   They are doing it for status, for money,

“Relationships die without communication, and communication is hardest in the midst of conflict.”

A thought by Leonard Sweet, (2012-03-13) from his book, What Matters Most: How We Got the Point but Missed the Person (Kindle Location 2355). Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition. That is so true.   Relationships are built on give and take, in other words, talking and listening. Not one person talking and the other person listening but each one talking and each one listening, really listening.  In there comes understanding and caring.   Now in conflict there usually isn’t any listening.   Oh both may be talking, telling their side of the situation, trying to convince the other one that they are right and that blocks communication which in turn damages relationships.   You see, relationships are built on the mutual desire to build each other up and not tear them down.   And conflict is built on tearing the other person down and building yourself up.   In conflict it is all about winning and the other person losing and that is damaging and it eventually could kill the relationsh